4 best books on marriage

The 4 Best Books on Marriage

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Many volumes discuss what makes a marriage healthy and godly. Some are better than others. Whether you have been married for years or plan on getting married in the future, here is my list of the 4 best books on marriage.

My 4 Best Books on Marriage for Christians

1. The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You’ve Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended by Sheila Wray Gregoire, Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach, and Joanna Sawatsky

The Great Sex Rescue by Sheila Wray Gregoire examines harmful teachings within many evangelical Christian sex and marriage resources. The authors suggest healthier, biblically-based alternatives. Gregoire, along with her co-authors, surveyed over 20,000 Christian women to uncover the impact of common Christian messages. These teachings often equate female value with male satisfaction and encourage women to accept harmful or non-consensual sexual practices. They also place the burden of male purity solely on female modesty and behavior.

This book critiques popular Christian marriage books that reinforce damaging stereotypes and create shame or guilt around women’s sexuality. Instead, The Great Sex Rescue offers insights into building intimate relationships based on mutual respect, open communication, and genuine connection. It encourages readers to embrace healthier views on sex and marriage by replacing harmful messages with ones that prioritize consent, equality, and shared joy in marriage.

2. Good News for Your Marriage: A Gospel-Centered Guide to a Victorious Marriage by Art Thomas

In Good News for Your Marriage, Art Thomas explores biblical principles for cultivating a Christ-centered relationship and strengthening marriages. Thomas emphasizes that marital struggles can often be overcome by focusing on our identity in Christ, selflessness, and forgiveness. He outlines practical steps for aligning marriage with God’s design, addressing communication, emotional intimacy, and mutual respect between spouses.

He also discusses the role of prayer, humility, and faith in fostering resilience in marriage. With these principles, he aims to help couples rediscover joy and unity in Christ. This book encourages readers to rely on spiritual transformation rather than behavior modification to build a fulfilling partnership.

3. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert by Dr. John Gottman and Nan Silver

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work distills decades of research into practical advice for building successful, lasting marriages. Gottman, a leading marriage researcher, identifies key behaviors that strengthen relationships and warns against patterns that often predict marital distress. Some of these seven principles include creating shared meaning, nurturing fondness and admiration, and “turning toward” each other.

The book provides exercises and tools for applying each principle to help couples build stronger foundations, improve intimacy, and avoid resentment and disconnection. Though this is not a Christian book, it provides a very healthy way forward and maintains a biblical marriage ethic.

4. Boundaries in Marriage: Understanding the Choices That Make or Break Loving Relationships by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

Boundaries in Marriage focuses on the importance of healthy boundaries in marriage to build a loving, respectful, and resilient partnership. The authors, who are psychologists and Christian counselors, explain that boundaries are essential for managing expectations, fostering mutual respect, and creating a balanced relationship where each spouse maintains their sense of self.

The book covers key principles like taking responsibility for personal emotions and actions, communicating needs effectively, and handling conflicts in a constructive way. Cloud and Townsend argue that boundaries allow couples to address issues without blaming or controlling each other and help each partner remain accountable, respectful, and loving.

Through practical examples and biblical insights, the authors guide couples in establishing healthy boundaries around issues like communication, finances, and intimacy. This empowers both partners to develop a stronger marriage by honoring each other’s individuality and supporting their growth together.

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