Pray in Desolate Places: Solitude in a World that Surrounds Us

“I heard you pray, and I can tell you are a prayer warrior,” an older woman told me.

In advance of our upcoming Easter service, my church held a Wednesday night prayer service. We were all full of faith and expectation for what God was going to do among us. I participated, and I prayed hard. Calling on God, I spoke his promises, and I took the kingdom by force (Matthew 11:12). However, this was the first time I had truly prayed in weeks.

Now don’t get me wrong, I talk to God in some way every day. I study the Bible a lot, and I read through devotionals that have themed prayers. Additionally, I also ask God for wisdom or guidance with different aspects of my life. But when this sister called me a prayer warrior, my heart sank.

I thanked her for her encouragement, but I felt like a fraud. Knowing myself, I could see what this woman of God could not. My heart was proud, and I was depending on my own strength.

All that to say, I think it is time for me to learn a few lessons from Jesus about what a life of prayer looks like. I hope you will go along with me on that journey here.

Jesus Gets Alone to Pray

After Jesus healed Peter’s mother-in-law of her fever, Mark 1:33 says that “the whole city was gathered together at the door.” Gospel writers Mark and Luke often tell us the same story in different words. After healing many of these people who were gathered, they both say that Jesus went to “a desolate place” (Mark 1:35; Luke 4:42). However, Mark is the only to add, “and there he prayed.” He wants us to understand that Jesus’ intention for solitude was pray. But why does he need to be alone?

Jesus, the Man

As observed above, Jesus healed multitudes of people. This would have taken hours. All day, people approach him asking for something. And, while he was a beautiful servant of mankind who wanted to give them what they needed, he was still a human. Though Jesus is God, the eternal Son of the Father, Philippians 2:7 says that “he emptied himself.” The New Living Translation says that “he gave up his divine privileges.”

This human nature he bore took on all the limitations of such a nature. He was subject to hunger, thirst, stress, and exhaustion. And on top of that, he too, like many of us introverts, got “peopled out” sometimes.

In order not to pour from an empty cup, Jesus took time to break away from the crowds that surrounded him and get alone with his Father to pray.

Jesus, the Missionary

When Simon Peter and the crowds caught up with him, Jesus reminded them of his mission to preach the gospel. He said, “I must preach the good news of the kingdom of God to the other towns as well; for I was sent for this purpose” (Luke 4:43). Jesus got alone to pray in order to prepare himself for the next stage of his mission. It was not a selfish sort of isolation that avoided people out of disdain for them. Jesus got alone out of compassion so that he could be ready to serve once again in new places.

Mark says after this that “he went throughout all Galilee, preaching in their synagogues and casting out demons” (Mark 1:39). Luke says that “he was preaching in the synagogues of Judea” (Luke 4:44). This appears like a contradiction, until we look at Matthew’s version. He specifically says that Jesus went “throughout all Galilee” (Matthew 4:23). However, he also adds that “great crowds followed his from Galilee and the Decapolis, and from Jerusalem and Judea, and from beyond the Jordan” (Matthew 4:25). In other words, Mark and Luke chose to emphasize specific locations, while Matthew reveals that Jesus had gone through many different places at this time.

The short of it is that Jesus stayed busy. His whole mission was to preach the gospel, and he made sure to do so all over the land of Israel.

But he only did so after he would pray in his desolate place.

We Must Also Get Alone

If the Son of God needed to prioritize praying by himself, so must we. For, “a disciple is not above his teacher, nor a servant above his master” (Matthew 10:24). And we must do so for the same reasons as our Lord.

Human Weakness

There is only so much we can take. Long work days, caring for children, and the many burdens of everyday life wear down on our weak human flesh. Our souls are troubled by both the cruelty and monotony of this world. And if we don’t take the time to get away from the demand of life to receive the supply of God, we will find ourselves trying to pour out from an empty cup.

Personally, I have been there. I have experienced what many call “burnout.” When my wife injured her foot, I became her caretaker when I got home from work. I was in a season of spiritual laziness before her injury. My prayer life had suffered the effects of apathy, fueled by past disappointments. So her injury only fed this for me. It was all I could do to get up in the morning for work. A lack of prayer led to a lack of energy, both physical and spiritual.

For the Mission

During this time, I found myself getting more and more angry at her, at God, and at myself. I hated the way I had to keep readjusting her splint until 4 or 5 am some days just to get it to not directly push on her ankle and cause her pain. I hated that God put us in this situation. But I also I hated the way I behaved. Instead of kindness, she was met with frustration from me. Instead of gentleness, harshness. Rather than patience, I gave her irritability.

Because I failed to get alone with God to pray, I did what I had to do out of obligation, not love. My mission was to care for my wife “in sickness and in health.” But my power to do that rightly was missing.

Just like Jesus, we are all sent for some purpose. Whatever that purpose is, there is no getting around the fact that we must pray. If we don’t, the “crowd” that surrounds us becomes overwhelming, and we will never be able to meet the demand.

But when the energy of God dwells in us through prayer, we will find ourselves ready to “go on to the next towns” (Mark 1:38).

How to Find Solitude

“Okay Sean, I get it. I need to get alone and pray. But how?” I’m glad you asked. It comes down to the right time and the right place.

The Right Time

For Jesus, in this situation, the right time to pray was “very early in the morning, while it was still dark” (Mark 1:35). At the end of a long day of ministry, Jesus rested. But he decided to wake up when the day was just beginning, before Simon could say to him, “Everyone is looking for you” (Mark 1:36). Jesus made time for what was important to him.

I have heard preachers say that everyone must get up very early in order to “start their day with God.” They cite many biblical verses that refers to Jesus and others doing so. Yet, there are other places in Scripture that indicate prayer in the middle of the day or at night. Jesus stayed up all night in prayer before commissioning his 12 Apostles (Luke 6:12-13). He also spent the evening in prayer on the night he was arrested (Matthew 26:30-46). And the prophet Daniel prayed three times a day (Daniel 6:10). This would have been morning, noon, and evening.

Many people pray like Daniel. And certainly there is power in that. Yet many others have work schedules that don’t allow for that same structure. For example, a person working the overnight shift should not be expected to wake up “early” to start their day. What does early even mean at that point?

Maybe you are like me and your body’s circadian rhythm makes late nights more productive than early mornings. If so, then maybe that means you need to stay up later to pray instead of getting up early. Or maybe you are a stay-at-home parent who has a two hour gap in the middle of the day at nap time. Whoever you are, it comes down to finding the right time where everyone is not looking for you.

The Right Place

We are also told that Jesus found “a desolate place” to pray. This word “desolate” in Greek is the same word for the “wilderness” where he went through temptation. It is a place without much life, activity, or noise. Some translations say a “secluded” or “solitary” place. The point is this: Find somewhere you can be that has no people or things that can be a distraction to you.

For the stay-at-home parent, that might be the whole house at nap time. For single people, it could be lying in your bed. Many working class people may find a break room useful, or the car on the way to work. The car is often my go to. I like to listen to the Daily Office Podcast so I can pray along with someone through the Anglican Book of Common Prayer. Personally, I use my phone for a lot of the resources and books that help me pray and study. For others, removing devices may be a part of creating your own temporary desolate place. Or maybe you want to literally obey Christ’s command to “go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret” (Matthew 6:6).

Check out the book Common Prayer: A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals!

Learn to Pray

Wherever and whenever you decide to be with God, he is there with you. What matters the most is intentionally removing distractions and responsibilities and making a time and place to pray.

Prayer takes practice. It takes growth. It takes learning. That is why the disciples later approached Jesus and asked, “Lord, teach us to pray” (Luke 11:1).

So if you don’t get it right, don’t be hard on yourself. The 12 most influential preachers to ever live didn’t get it right at first. It just starts with getting started.

To learn more about prayer, check out my list of the 6 Best Books on Prayer for Serious Christians.

Footnotes

*If you enjoyed this post, please comment your thoughts down below and consider subscribing to receive updates on new blog posts.